You can also consider reaching out and rekindling your friendship when you are in a better place, emotionally
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My husband says he doesn’t want children, but I want one and this has caused a lot of serious issues in our marriage. He has always been sure about not wanting children, but I always thought I could convince him. We spoke about it while we were dating and he said he would think about it in the future, which I assumed meant he would change his mind. We have now been married for three years and he is still adamant that we shouldn’t have one. I am considering ending this marriage because the longer I wait, the harder it will be for me to have a child and start a family. I love my husband a lot, but this is a deal-breaker. I can’t blame him because he hasn’t changed his stance, but I feel as if I should have been more forthright about how this is non-negotiable. Am I doing the right thing?
If this is non-negotiable for you—and parenting is a critical, life-altering decision—this isn’t about right or wrong. You want a child, so choosing to walk away and start a family makes sense. Blaming yourself or your husband is irrelevant given that you have both been clear about your expectations. If he can’t agree, and you can’t give up the idea, ending this sooner rather than later is the only feasible thing to do. Speak to family and friends, and don’t be afraid to ask for support.
Should I remain in contact with my long-distance ex even though we couldn’t maintain our relationship? My hesitancy comes from my inability to forget about him because I know that distance was the only thing standing between us.
If this didn’t work for specific reasons, and you would rather move on, there is nothing that compels you to stay in touch. You can also consider reaching out and rekindling your friendship when you are in a better place, emotionally.
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