If you don’t feel the same way, you will know that this is best left behind you. If that happens, nothing stops you from both working on being friends
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I have been thinking of getting back with my ex-girlfriend and don’t know if this is a good idea. She and I were great together but ended our relationship because we had professional commitments that made it hard for us to focus on our personal lives. We are older now, and more settled, and he recently asked if I would consider meeting again because he thought we had a chance to try this again. A part of me thinks this is possible, but I also wonder about whether we are doing this for the right reasons. I know there is a strong sense of nostalgia at work, but I worry that it may not be enough to sustain anything serious once that initial feeling has faded. Should I just let this lie in the past and look forward?
Nostalgia is powerful, and you’re right that it may not be enough, but there really is no way to know for certain unless you try. Meeting him a few times will allow you to evaluate this better, and you can then decide if the past is not worth revisiting. If you don’t feel the same way, you will know that this is best left behind you. If that happens, nothing stops you from both working on being friends.
A year ago, I began chatting with someone I met on Facebook because we had a lot of common friends. We have grown very close since, and he now wants to meet me. What I haven’t told him is that I don’t look like my profile pictures anymore. I know this may come as a disappointment to him and don’t know how to avoid it. Should I send him a picture before meeting him?
Why are you worried about how he may react? Do you have feelings for him that compel you to be nervous? You should be taken at face value, not an online avatar, and only people who do that are worthy of being in your life, in whatever capacity.
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